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Thursday, March 08, 2007

People I Hate

Editor's Note: Yes, I know it's Thursday, but since the Weekend Caption Contest is in its cushy Friday spot, I decided to move PIH to Thursdays. Sorry.

It's been a while since I posted an episode of People I Like. Unfortunately, it will be even longer, because there are a bus load of idiots to rant about this week. Bon apetit!

Sports Illustrated

I have always despised Sports Illustrated, because they rarely (if ever) write about the NHL or NASCAR. However, my six-year old was selling magazine subscriptions for his school, and I wanted to support the team. It is only March and I want to cancel my subscription. Here's why:

A few weeks ago, columnist Rick Reilly wrote a piece about exceptional athletes who joined the armed services. He gushed over their sports exploits and their decisions to serve their country rather than the almighty dollar. I knew where this was going, but I read on. Reilly writes that these five athletes were killed in action, then ends with a blast straight out of the DNC playbook:

"And they throw their whole selves into it anyway, because they are brave and disciplined and will chew through concrete to win the game.

But what if the game can't be won?" (H/T - Private Pigg)

I haven't read Reilly's detritus since, but I still glance through this rag. At least until yesterday, when I received this week's dose of liberal hippie wisdom, and saw this cover story:

Yeah, I know. I went nuts when I saw it, too. Is every media outlet buying Al Gore's snake oil now? In fairness, I haven't read this story, but the cover alone is enough to angry up the blood. For anyone walking by a newsstand will think that global warming will cause the oceans to swallow up Florida sooner rather than later. Considering the play of the Marlins, Devil Rays, Dolphins, and Buccaneers of late, that may not be a bad thing.

SI is fast becoming the Dixie Chicks of the sports magazine world. I'm through with them. If anyone wants the rest of my subscription, you can find it in Denny's fireplace.

Pennsylvania Governor Ed Rendell

This fat bastard is a PIH staple, and he's frakking up again.

PITTSBURGH (AP) -- Penguins owner Ron Burkle traveled to Las Vegas on Wednesday to meet with the mayor and discuss the possibility of relocating the team there. Burkle, who lives in Los Angeles, led a delegation in talks with Las Vegas Mayor Oscar B. Goodman, according to Penguins spokesman Tom McMillan.

Goodman is a former Philly guy, well aware of the monetary benefits an NHL team can bring.

The Penguins' lease at 46-year-old Mellon Arena, the oldest facility in the league, expires June 30. The Penguins have repeatedly said they may move, or sell the team to a buyer who would relocate the franchise if an arena deal isn't in place by then. (H/T - Yahoo!)

Rendell couldn't care less about Pittsburgh. He cares only about Philadelphia - and even then, he had no problem cutting cops and fireman's salaries while mayor there - and the Pens are at the bottom of his Things to Do list. Unfortunately, he doesn't realize what a gem he has in the Pens, who employ the best player in the game in Sidney Crosby. He will be the face of the NHL for the next 20 years, and that face could be located in my state. Rendell, however, lets the team wallow in a decrepit arena without a fair deal to keep them in the city, then blasts them for wanting to move.

Personally, I hope they get their wish and move to either Kansas City or Las Vegas, then give Fat Eddie the finger on their way out of town. A-hole!

Rosie O'Donnell

Speaking of fat bastards . . .

Rosie O'Donnell says she began being treated for depression after the Columbine school shootings and hangs upside down for up to a half-hour a day to improve her mental state.

When gunmen killed 13 people at Columbine High School in Colorado in 1999, O'Donnell said she felt as if it had happened to her children. (H/T - AP)

Except that it didn't happen to your children, you fat piece of crap! You don't have real children, you toad, because you haven't seen a penis since high school anatomy class! I figured that she suffered from depression because she can't keep the Ring Dings out of her blowhole. Can you imagine this fat frak hanging upside down for a half an hour? When is she hanging from, a Kryptonite bar?

Rosie, do us all a favor and enjoy a nice, cool glass of shut the hell up!

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