Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Excedrin Headache #99

God, I think I'm gonna be sick . . .

LOS ANGELES - Two jurors who acquitted Michael Jackson of child molestation charges now say they think the pop star was guilty - and they are penning tell-all books about the jury's deliberations, the Daily News has learned. (Hat Tip - The New York Daily News.)

Am I the only person in America that wants to beat these "celebrity jurors" about the head with a Sunday newspaper - ads and all? And why are we giving book deals to the ones who royally frakked up? From the O.J. imbeciles to the Jacko morons, these people should be shunned, not rewarded. (Why don't we shun people anymore?) Look, if the jury acquitted Jackson because of a lack of evidence (doubtful) or the questionable credibility of the plaintiff's family (likely), that's fine. But, don't you dare come out publicly and tell the world only what it wants to hear.

To quote Robert DeNiro in Cop Land, "You blew it!" To acquit Jacko even when you thought he was guilty makes you people cowards. No one wants to hear your story. Instead, let me lend you a copy of Twelve Angry Men. Maybe you'll learn something.


  1. My favorite part is Jackson's lawyers venting their ire over the affair. Who the hell picked out these pillars of the community in the first place! The are the ones to pick these dopes for the high probability of aquittal.

    Stone cold stupidity figured prominently in every resume.

  2. The running joke around the department is that you can't trust anyone who isn't smart enough to get out of jury duty!

  3. what parent in their right mind would let their child sleep in the same bed as a grown man? didn't they know he was accused of this before?

    while we're on the MJ kick, what about his wife Debbie Rowe? how stupid is she for giving him children of his own?

    when they said brains, they thought they said trains and got in the wrong line.