Bah Humbug!

Is it okay to say "I hate Christmas" yet?

This frakkin' thing to the left is the Mickey Mouse Clubhouse. For the childless in the audience, this means nothing. For those of us with toddlers, this toy is The Devil Itself! Allow me to explain.

The Disney Channel runs an animated program entitled "Mickey Mouse Clubhouse." I have watched the show a few times with Erik, my two-year old, and I must admit, it's pretty good for what it is. The rat bastards at Disney must realize this as well, because they released - just in time for the birth of Christ - a toy version of the television clubhouse, and all of the characters in the show in action figure form.

Once Erik saw this in the Sears catalog, it was over. Mom and Dad needed to obtain this product immediately, even if we had to leave a path of mutilated corpses in our wake. Okay, I'm all up for that. Unfortunately, this blasted contraption appears to be this year's Tickle Me Elmo. You cannot find this thing anywhere! The missus even left a message on the Sears website asking to be informed when it escapes its "Out of Stock" purgatory. Every time we get an e-mail alert, we rush to the site, only to find out again it is sold out. Frakkers!

I have used most of the tools at my disposal to procure one in time for Christmas. Hell, I even have my friend Kevin scouring the streets of Arizona looking for one to no avail. We want this thing pretty badly, but not badly enough to pay upwards of $70 on eBay. I mean, the thing usually sells for $39.99; I love my son, but come on!

As it stands, we will probably not have it for Erik on the 25th. Luckily for us, his third birthday is on February 9th, so maybe I can wrangle one up by then.