Tonight, the missus and I decided to take the Earp clan out to dinner. The kids were playing in the almost non-existent snow after school, the missus is six months pregnant, and I am too lazy to cook for them. Problem solved!
We took the kids to Bugaboo Creek Steakhouse in the Franklin Mills Mall. It has a Canadian theme - without all of the Canadians, heh - and a lot of crazy talking crap on the walls. A talking buffalo, a talking moose, a flopping fish, all for the entertainment of the kiddies. We place our order and I play tic tac toe on the kid's menu with Kyle. (He kicked my tail.)
The food finally arrived, and, as usual, Kyle announces that he has to go to the bathroom. Because who wants to eat hot food, right? I get up to take him, and almost instantly Erik states that he has to go. Swell.
We enter the men's room - the toilets were manual; hooray! - and the boys enter separate stalls to do their dirty, sinful business. I'm kidding; everybody poops. When they're finished, I ask them to wait a second while I tinkle. (Yes, I actually said "tinkle." When you have kids, you will, too.) I approach the urinal and commence.
I didn't know this at the time, but Erik has never used a urinal. In fact he had never really seen one before, because when both kids need to go, I take Kyle, and the missus takes Erik. So, as I am tinkling, Erik laughs and says the following:I wanted to laugh, but I was a little busy at the time. Kyle, on the other hand, was bent over in laughter. Apparently, Erik wanted to see me tinkle all over myself, because when his comment didn't make me lose it, he came up to me, looked at the urinal, and said:
That pretty much did it for me. I quickly finished, washed my hands, and thanked God that no one else was in the bathroom. When we got back to the table, Kyle told the missus what had happened. Since she wasn't in a bathroom, she laughed out loud.
Gee, I can't wait until the third boy gets here.
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