People I Hate

Wow, it's been a hell of a week. Thankfully, yours truly will be vacationing in (hopefully) sunny Orlando, Florida all next week - more on that tomorrow - so this will be my last PIH until May. I hope you enjoy this edition, because I am really in one of those typical Wyatt moods.

Philadelphia Mayor John F. (the cops) Street

The November elections cannot come soon enough. Mayor Assclown was holding a press conference on Tuesday about the Philadelphia School System - in a word, it's an abortion - when someone asked him about the Virginia Tech Bloodbath. During one of his boring, rambling responses, he was asked if he would consider placing Philadelphia police officers in the city's schools. Here's what he said:

"If we put armed Philadelphia police officers into the city's schools . . . with Glocks that carry 19 rounds . . . in 90 days someone is gonna get shot! Glocks with 19 rounds! I know I wouldn't want my kids in that school!"

Please choose the best description that fits this diatribe:

A. Mayor John Street believes that if Philadelphia police officers are placed into the schools, they will use deadly force against unruly teenagers within three months.

B. Mayor John Street is too stupid/ignorant to know the capacity (in rounds) of his city-owned weapons. The answer, by the way, is 18. Seventeen in the magazine, and one in the chamber.

C. Mayor John Street is the worst mayor in American history.

D. All of the above.

Now, in fairness, this is not an exact quote, but it's pretty close. I heard the audio on Dom Giordano's radio program Tuesday night, but no one in the local media even mentioned it. I know; you are all shocked. The fact of the matter is that as Street's corruption-laced two-term run is about to end, he has shown nothing but contempt for the police officers and firefighters of this city. Hell, he didn't even have time to make my promotion ceremony, where close to 200 police officers were promoted to various ranks, even though the event took place about fourteen blocks from City Hall . . . and two blocks from his residence!

The November elections cannot come soon enough.

Sanjaya Malakar

Let me preface this rant by stating that I have never seen an entire episode of American Idol. I just don't get the appeal. Having said that, you'd have to be a hermit to not hear anything about it. Or, if you're like me, you get to read about the jackass contestants the show seems to produce in droves. Like Sanjaya, for instance.

NEW YORK - Sanjaya Malakar, the under-talented but unflappable singer who horrified and captivated millions in his improbable "American Idol" run, was finally voted off the show Wednesday night. When the result was announced, Malakar wiped away tears and got a big hug from LaKisha Jones, the next lowest vote-getter. "I'm fine," he told Ryan Seacrest. "It was an amazing experience." (H/T - Yahoo!)

Can we please stop with this no-talent clod now? It was a riot when people were voting for this reincarnation of William Hung - which would have been my pr0n name - but after a while I was sick of hearing about it. There are enough untalented people in this world, like Denny for example. Heh. You had a nice run, Sanjaya. Now get back to the Quik-E-Mart.

Tony Frakkin' Stewart

I despise this piece of detritus. He's a fat, sarcastic wiseass. God, I hate people like that!

* Hold on, while I dodge this lightning*

But even a scumbag like Tony Stewart can have a redeeming value. The former NASCAR champ recently stated this after Sunday's race in Texas:

"I'm ready to retire as soon as I can get enough money saved where I can retire, I'd be more than happy to step away."

And I'd be more than happy to see you go. Don't let the restrictor plate hit you in the ass, you fat putz!