You Can Take That To The Bank

As I wrote yesterday, my friend Bill was promoted to Senior Vice-President of Huntingdon Valley Bank. Naturally, a position such as this comes with added responsibilities; some are obvious, some are not. After some brilliant detective work, I found out some other duties which will fall into Bill’s lap. Enjoy!

Bill’s Top Ten Other Duties As Senior VP

10. Lying to Congress.
9. Writing “$” on every money bag.
8. Supplying bread for the free toasters’ test run.
7. Ensuring all of the pens are chained down.
6. Avoiding getting locked in the vault with Mr. Mooney. (Oops, that’s a Lucy Ricardo duty.)
5. Using dye packs to paint his office.
4. Dressing up like the Monopoly guy (monocle and top hat included).
3. Interviewing hot, leggy, prospective tellers.
2. Making sure the dollar bills all face the same way.

And Bill’s number one other duty is . . .

1. Modifying his car horn to play “We’re in the money.”