“Are you the creator of Hi and Lois, because you are making me laugh?” – The Comic Book Guy, The Simpsons
Deathlok is a brother of The Badger and another graduate of Archbishop Ryan High School. As a young boy, he survived a meteor shower, but walked away with awesome powers; namely, the power to know anything and everything about comic books. His powers only strengthened after his stint as a comic book store clerk with Grimjack. If you need to know the origin of Emma Frost, or who is the mother of Nightcrawler, Deathlok is your guy. It is rumored that The Comic Book Guy is based upon his life story.
Despite Deathlok’s awesome comic book powers, he actually landed a lovely bride; a beautiful redhead who dabbles in Irish Dance. Jackpot! In Deathlok’s uber-Celtic household, Sinn Fein isn’t radical enough. I dare not tell them that my father’s family has roots in England; I would have to get my wife to start my car every day.
Deathlok’s kryptonite is sports. While he always puts forth a gallant effort, his hockey skills come up small – unless, of course, it is during a hockey fight. In the midst of an impending brawl, he once slammed a thug in the back with his hockey stick. Nice! Fortunately for us, his hockey knowledge is unsurpassed. He is the commish of our fantasy hockey league, a Flyers season ticket holder, and devoted Nick Fotiu fan. It also helps that, as a government employee, he can continuously surf the web at work.
Deathlok: when you absolutely, positively have to find Japanese anime filth overnight.
Haven't I seen a movie about youse guys? ;)
ReplyDeleteUhhh....the anime link doesn't work.
ReplyDeleteI mean, that's what someone told me....
You mean like when Wyatt ordered pancakes at the Dining Car with his dick out? It was funnier after the waitress left and we realized the booth had mirrored ceilings. No wonder she referred to him as "short stack"
ReplyDeleteThat above is funnier when read under the correct post..
ReplyDeleteNo, it was funny, period. Short Stack...I'll have to put that in my file of dry wit to share with others.
ReplyDeleteI wish I had the colorful and interesting friends you have, Wyatt.
Deathie...is there a comic book version of Stoker's Dracula that I could use in with my high school students???? Puhleaze let me know. Thanks.
Linda - Yeah, but it was in anime.
ReplyDeleteCUG - Well played. I'm sure you can find some on the web.
Grim - Wrong post. Arse.
RT - I'll thank you to not laugh at my idiocy.
I just want to say that if you hate innocent people and don't want me to visit your blog, you know what, fine. Mine's cooler anyway. And I'd also like to say that I noticed right from the very start that you hated me as well, (is it because I'm INNOCENT?) and don't care too much anyway. Why isn't Waldo J. Cartridge on the list of five things you hate? I don't hate anyone, as hate is too strong a word. In the words of a much better blogger, Paul of fidelgiamatti.blogspot.com, "FREE MUMIA" Peace out, WORD!
ReplyDelete(when I get famous please don't ask for an autograph)
In the only words that ever made sense coming out of David Lee Roth's mouth, "Sid'down, Waldo!"
ReplyDeleteGrow the f--k up you loser! You should worry yourself about those that take up the flag for a cause just for face time on camera because their acting careers are washed up and they need the only stage they can get (sadly they think they are relavant)...in front of losers like you who are too dumb to know the difference between the truth and lies built from misinformation and conspiracy.
One word: 'TARD.
ReplyDeleteYou may have just moved to the top of my beatdown list.
Who names themselves after a stupid icon of 80's pop culture? Why didn't you just name yourself "Cabbage Patch" (after the doll, not the dance, stupid!)
Oh, I checked out your blog/website/whatever. Do yourself a favor, stop screenwriting; quit your day job. Being an engineer, I know all about the Crappy Writing Skills Club. You're in the club, man; possibly VP.
And HATE is not too strong of a word. I hate people who need need attention and need to be liked by everybody. "Oh Wyatt, why don't you like me". Maybe he likes you, maybe he doesn't. Who gives a rat's ass? I don't like you; get over it. Most of Wyatt's Inner Circle don't like me and I'm happy for that...but that's because I'm better looking than they are.
Excuse me whilst I stick a toothpick into the tip of my pee-pee as that is more enjoyable than listening to your blah-blah-blah-ness.
You are right about one thing: Free Mumia. Yes, free Mumia, so someone can finally shoot and kill that a-hole.
Schween-bag!
Waldo- you get the award for dumbest fuck of the day. Perhaps some of the 50 pounds you need to lose is between your ears? Only a complete and utter jackass could read the facts of the case, then advocate to free Mumia. Of course, Hollywood is filled with complete and utter jackasses, so you should fit right in (once you lose the 50 pounds that is). Maybe you should just go an eat a fuckin carrot, and leave the thinkin to us types who will actually look at the facts and understand them. Better yet, free Mumia, and let him live at your house.
ReplyDeleteIn the words of me: Fry Mumia
RT - Funny.
ReplyDeleteAH - Very funny.
Randal - Unbelievably funny!!!
Grim - Pee my pants funny!!!
All - you are giving too much attention to this toad, and that's what he craves. Don't respond to his idiotic comments. ABSOLUTELY DO NOT visit his "blog." Just do what I have been doing since the first day he stopped here: ignore him.
The last thing anyone needs is a MumIdiot discussion the day of Officer Skerski's funeral. But thanks for the support.
Somebody made a Mumia support comment on this blog? Hm, I must have missed it.
ReplyDeleteOk, Papi....I'll ignore is sniveling ass. Just ignore the post I left for today...you don't need the added grrrness. :)
ReplyDeleteI thought this post was about me??
ReplyDeleteWay to steal my camera time Waldo.
But enough about me, let's talk about me. . . . .
Sure, I know comics. My social life consists of my cousin (Grim), two friends from highschool and leeching off my brother's friends like a Mynoch on a power cable. (heh heh . . .I've been waiting all week to use that one. . . gone are the days of the Remora references . . . .but I digress . . .
Anyway, I know lots of things. On Jeopardy, I can run the Norse Mythology category (Thor), Name several classical pieces of music (Bigs Bunny), locations in England (Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy Radio series and books). This obsurdness deserves a quick post. . .hop over to my place.
rt, As for Drac, there are several Dracula comics Tomb of Dracula was agreat series in the 70s. But as for Bram, check here
http://www.milehighcomics.com/cgi-bin/backissue.cgi?action=list&title=12716561456&snumber=1
(I suck at linking . . . .despite two kids)
Oh, and let's set the records straight.
ReplyDelete1. I didn't hit him in the back. This stoned guy was threatening my "goalie equipment encrusted" brother. When I said something, he came at me, threw a skate and I hit him in the ribs with everything I had (one of the everything being the hockey stick). It's not like a punched a girl in the face!!
2. Just because I'm stitched together like the Scarecrow in the Wizard of Oz (I figured Jigsaw from the Punisher comic was too obscure), doesn't mean that I lack hockey skill. I won the World Famous Deathlok's Playoff pool (and am in the running this year, again), the highly regarded FHL Stanley Cup and (shamefully to everyone else) the Fantasy Football league. I have the athletic dexterity of a Larch (Monty Python reference alert!) and rotor cuff agility of the Tinman (two Oz refernces for the price of one. . . .I'd better stop before I do the Tick Tock refernce from Return to Oz . ."My action has run down" . .. too late!) You know I have to add that I had more points in the Golden Eagle league (my last professional year) than you.
3. As for the Anime, the Comic convention is a few weeks away and Anime Girls Gone Wild should be showing up at Man's Weekend this year.