Naked Woman Was Driving With Guns, Drugs...

A completely naked Mississippi woman was driving erratically in a car containing marijuana and illegally modified firearms when she was pulled over late Sunday evening, according to police.

During the traffic stop in the town of Ellisville (pop. 4652), police discovered that driver Katelyn Maxwell, 22, was unencumbered by any clothing. Maxwell, who was alone in the 2017 Dodge Challenger--which reeked of pot--appeared to be under the influence, investigators reported.

A search of the vehicle turned up a Glock handgun at Maxwell’s feet and another Glock wedged between the passenger seat and center console. In the trunk, cops found a third Glock and two AR-15 rifles, one of which appeared to have been outfitted with a “switch” that would make it fully automatic.

Seen above, Maxwell was arrested on an assortment of felony and misdemeanor counts for which she is locked up in the Jones County jail in lieu of $35,000 bond.

I wonder how long Katelyn Maxwell will be in jail.

Sorry About The Blogging, It Was A Mess Lately

Yesterday, I was taking down the washing when I fell down the steps.

I was holding the lanudry when I fell two steps.

The missus is still dealing with her procedure, so I said I would take the washer.

I fell very hard, and at the end of the mess, a table was on top of me.

It wasn't fun, and my kneecaps were a bloody mess.

Sorry about the couple days.

Woman Goes From Choke Slam To Slammer

Angered about her girlfriend “not wanting to be sexual this morning,” a Florida Woman allegedly strangled the victim and performed a WWE-style chokeslam before grabbing a pair of scissors and chasing her partner out of their home, police report.

Tykia Sherman, 32, was arrested Sunday on multiple felony charges related to a violent confrontation last month in her St. Petersburg residence.

Tykia Sherman is not exactly the woman that men would want to see, but hey, she's trying.

The 31-year-old victim told police that after she declined to engage in sexual activity, Sherman “became upset” and shoved her against a wall and struck her numerous times. The woman added that Sherman then choked her and slammed her onto a couch.

She seems like she could jump into the WWE.

Shudder.

Woman Denied Owning Coke In Her Butt

A Florida Woman who denied ownership of the bag of cocaine that fell from her buttocks while being booked into custody told jailers that the drug must have been placed there during an “intimate encounter” with an unnamed partner.

During a traffic stop Saturday, Reagan Cox, 30, allegedly resisted a Brevard County sheriff’s deputy, resulting in her arrest on a misdemeanor charge.

Cox, seen at right, was transported to the local jail, a brief drive from her residence in Rockledge, a city on Florida’s Space Coast.

During the jail intake process, Cox had to pass through an X-ray scanner, which is used to spot contraband like weapons, phones, or drugs.

When jailers detected an anomaly in Cox’s “lower region,” she was brought to a room where she was subsequently seen “trying to cover her buttocks area with her hand.”

Upon moving her hand, a baggie containing 3.8 grams of cocaine fell from Cox’s rear end. With the coke at her feet, Cox denied knowing anything about the drug. She speculated that somebody must have placed the narcotics inside her during a sexual encounter.

Well done, dumbass.

Two Kentuckians Are Facing Felony Charges Which Was "Totes Not Full Of Drugs."

Two Kentuckians are facing felony charges after a search of their car turned up narcotics, some of which were inside a bag carrying the misspelled assurance, “Deffntely not a bag full full of drugs.”

Tricia Croley, 51, and Damon Bennett, 48, were collared by a Laurel County Sheriff’s Office detective who looked into their parked car and spotted “a plastic baggie which contained suspected narcotics.”

The investigator subsequently found another bag (seen above) that also held narcotics. In addition to drug counts, Croley was charged with providing police with a fake ID, while Bennett was found to have outstanding arrest warrants.

Hmm, wonder is they got to start smoking before they were arrested.

Dumbasses.

Inmate Cops To Smuggling Wine In Vagina

Recognizing that the 12.5% proof was in the pudding, a Michigan woman yesterday pleaded guilty to trying to smuggle into jail wine that was hidden inside her body, according to court records.

Before its discovery, the unopened bottle of Cupcake Vineyards Pinot Grigio was stored inside the vagina of Monique Megchiani, 48, who was arrested last month for trespassing at a CVS pharmacy in Grand Traverse.

Appearing Wednesday in Circuit Court, Megchiani copped to a felony contraband count that carries a maximum five-year prison sentence. In return for her guilty plea, prosecutors have agreed to drop several other charges.

Following her bust, Megchiani was handcuffed, checked for weapons, and put into a squad car. “During this time,” a cop reported, “Megchiani advised that she was not able to get into the vehicle. After some convincing, Megchiani was able to slowly maneuver herself into the backseat.”

Sorry about this. Not that I was late for a blog today, but the "woman" I had to see. Yikes!

Woman Says She Got Herpes From Arby's Food

An Arby’s worker in Oklahoma has been charged with spitting in the food of a customer, an alleged contamination that the female victim says resulted in her contracting oral herpes, according to police and court records.

In late-March, Jennica Church, 38, placed an order at the restaurant in Broken Bow, a city in the state’s southeastern corner. Church, a bartender who had just gotten off work that Saturday evening, waited in the drive-thru line for her “4 for $10 sandwich meal,” cops reported.

Investigators charge that while Church’s order was being prepared, worker Amanda Hendricks, 38, spit in the food.

Wow, this woman would spit in someone's food, and claiming she got herpes.

Maybe I can go to Broken Bow to see this fabulous woman.

Detective Spends Months Searching for Stolen Dementia Patient’s Ring–Finds it in a Pawnshop Miles Away

Going from a small town to the big city, a police detective went far beyond the call of duty to retrieve a woman’s stolen wedding ring.

In LeRoy, New York, an elderly nursing home resident suffering from dementia—unable to care or speak for herself—had a wedding ring stolen from her hand.

The theft was noticed by the victim’s family, who reported it to police after realizing the ring was missing, according to a statement from the LeRoy Police Department.

Enter Kaden Vangalio, a police detective whose outstanding diligence and persistence resulted in getting the valuable heirloom back—after months of dead-end investigations.

Enter Kaden Vangalio, a police detective whose outstanding diligence and persistence resulted in getting the valuable heirloom back—after months of dead-end investigations.

“During the investigation, Clark was evasive and avoided contact with investigators for months,” the department wrote. “Through persistent follow-up and continued investigative work, she ultimately turned herself in to face the charges."

Jasmine Delvin Was Driving At 108 MPH Near Maricopa, Arizona

A “Love Island” superfan was also a super speeder, cops allege.

Jasmine Melvin, 34, was driving to her Maricopa, Arizona home last Tuesday when a state trooper clocked her vehicle going 108 mph on Route 347 (where the speed limit is 65).

Upon being pulled over, Melvin explained that she was rushing home to watch that night’s installment of “Love Island USA.” The reality dating competition, which launched its eighth season earlier this month, airs on Peacock.

The streaming service describes the show’s contestants as “a group of sexy singles living in a tropical villa.”

Melvin’s vehicle was impounded and “went to car jail for 20 days,” according to an Arizona Department of Public Safety statement.

I have a feeling Jasmine won't like to be leaving anytime soon.

Let's hope her jail buddy doesn't come off to Jasmine. Yikes!

Well, I Felt To Get Another Beautiful Woman, Slovak Actress Vica Kerekes

She's gorgeous, she's a great actress, and I think she's amazing.

I love this girl, and I think she's one of the best actresses in Slovakia. She really is completely beautiful.