Arson Is No Remedy For Cold Feet

The criminal probe resulted in Monday’s arrest of Lenita Moreno for aggravated arson, theft, and providing false information to police. Moreno allegedly stole two cigarette lighters from an Ace Hardware store a few hours before the fire. Moreno’s fiancé told police that he and Moreno had been in the Relief Society room minutes before the fire alarm went off. While Moreno reportedly admitted to stealing from Ace, she did not want to reveal what she swiped.

Moreno allegedly stole two cigarette lighters from an Ace Hardware store a few hours before the fire. Moreno’s fiancé told police that he and Moreno had been in the Relief Society room minutes before the fire alarm went off. While Moreno reportedly admitted to stealing from Ace, she did not want to reveal what she swiped.

Setting fire to the church where you are scheduled to be married is no cure for a bride-to-be’s cold feet.

Police allege that a 25-year-old woman started a blaze earlier this month inside a Utah church as family members were setting up for a wedding ceremony planned for the following day, according to a probable cause affidavit.

After a fire alarm sounded inside a Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints building in Kaysville, a Salt Lake City suburb, relatives were able to put out the flames with a fire extinguisher and “water from some of the wedding decorations.”

The criminal probe resulted in Monday’s arrest of Lenita Moreno for aggravated arson, theft, and providing false information to police.

Moreno allegedly stole two cigarette lighters from an Ace Hardware store a few hours before the fire. Moreno’s fiancé told police that he and Moreno had been in the Relief Society room minutes before the fire alarm went off.

While Moreno reportedly admitted to stealing from Ace, she did not want to reveal what she swiped.

Well, I guess Lenita Moreno won't be at the altar for many years...

Czech Hacks Her Way Into The Record Books With A Lumberjack

As Karolina Urbanova broke the log of white pine she was standing on in half with her axe, she notched the 2nd world record for women’s speed lumberjack events she set that day.

The 11 inches of white pine was severed in 21.28 seconds, besting the previous time of 24.26.

Urbanova is one of a generation of women reaching elite levels in “timber sports,” which while being niche (to say the least) in the US, is virtually non-existent in her home country of Czechia.

She's also very pretty if I may say myself.

Oh, the family is at Outer Banks, and we should be back on the 15th. I will still try to continue blog.

Nursing Aide Took Naked Pic Of Patient, 93

A licensed nursing assistant took a naked photo of a 93-year-old female patient with dementia and sent the image to her ex-girlfriend, according to investigators who arrested the caregiver on a felony voyeurism charge

Florida police allege that Jessica Johnson, 44, took the photo around 4 AM Wednesday while the sleeping victim was “lying in her bed at the nursing facility naked.”

Johnson, cops say, then sent her ex-girlfriend the digital image along with a text message stating, “My first room...ugh, LMAO.” According to an arrest affidavit, that communication included “two laughing emojis.

Seen above, Johnson was charged with digital voyeurism, a third degree felony. She was booked into the county jail, from which she was later released after posting $5000 bond.

Iowa Woman Busted On Lawn Mower OUI Rap

An Iowa woman whose driver’s license is suspended due to a conviction for driving her SUV while under the influence of meth has again been busted for operating a moving vehicle while impaired, according to court records.

Meet Michelle Hudson, an obviously lunatic who was driving a Lawn Mower while meth.

While her breath test registered under the legal limit, Hudson was “believed to be on a drug,” cops reported.

Hudson, who refused to provide a urine sample, was arrested for operating under the influence and driving while barred, both of which are aggravated misdemeanors. Hudson is being held without bond in the county jail in advance of an initial court appearance.

It's a shame, since when you look at this woman, you won't think if she is a female or a meth junkie.

"That's Just What Girls Do," Said Accused Florida Woman, 51

When confronted about messages threatening death to a male acquaintance, a Florida Woman gave police a bizarre explanation for her 3 AM texts.

“That’s just what girls do,” said Tammy Baldino.

Police charge that Baldino texted the 51-year-old victim “I will kill you” and “I have a gun and a bullet with your name on it.” Police recovered the texts from Baldino’s phone, which she reportedly said nobody else used and of which she had sole possession.

She seems like a nice woman.

Arrested yesterday on a pair of felony counts, Baldino, 51, was booked into the Pinellas County jail. The Palm Harbor resident is locked up in lieu of $20,000 bond. At the time of her arrest, Baldino was free on bond in an earlier case charging her with DUI and unlawful possession of nitrous oxide. Her $5500 bond in that matter was revoked today.

Police: Nemo Was Found Engaging In Some Lewd Pantless Activity

Children, avert your eyes.

A Florida tattoo artist is behind bars after being allegedly spotted outside an apartment building at 2:30 AM “with his pants down inserting a sex toy in his anus,” police report.

Jonathan Nemeth, 44, was arrested for indecent exposure early yesterday morning and booked into the county jail on the misdemeanor rap.

Cops say that a victim took a photo of Nemeth “exposing himself in a vulgar manner.” When confronted by St. Petersburg police, Nemeth reportedly “admitted to exposing himself ” outside the Essex Court complex where he resides.

According to court and Florida Department of Corrections records, Nemeth served more than a decade in state prison for narcotics possession, armed robbery, and fraud convictions.

Tinder "Sugar Baby" Deal Goes Really Sour

A “sugar baby” arrangement went sour when a young woman who apparently wanted nothing to do with the string attached fled the home of a Florida Man who then gave chase in his truck, rammed into her vehicle, and pulled a gun on her friend, police report.

Wow, some crazy man with a firearm rammed into her vehicle.

According to investigators, David O’Brien, 67, met the 21-year-old woman this month on the Tinder dating app. During a subsequent exchange of messages, O’Brien explained that he was “looking for a sugar baby” and would pay “$1000 each visit...dinner and I love to shop for you.

“The defendant then attempted to locate the other victims briefly until he heard law enforcement arriving,” the report states. When deputies arrived at the scene, O’Brien was “at his F150 with the gun in his possession.” The woman and her three friends, cops reported, all “stated that they were in fear for their lives.

Seen above, David O’Brien was arrested on five felony charges: aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and four counts of aggravated battery. He is being held in lieu of $90,000 bond in the Sumter County jail.

Enjoy your stay in jail. Dumbass.

Naked Woman Was Driving With Guns, Drugs...

A completely naked Mississippi woman was driving erratically in a car containing marijuana and illegally modified firearms when she was pulled over late Sunday evening, according to police.

During the traffic stop in the town of Ellisville (pop. 4652), police discovered that driver Katelyn Maxwell, 22, was unencumbered by any clothing. Maxwell, who was alone in the 2017 Dodge Challenger--which reeked of pot--appeared to be under the influence, investigators reported.

A search of the vehicle turned up a Glock handgun at Maxwell’s feet and another Glock wedged between the passenger seat and center console. In the trunk, cops found a third Glock and two AR-15 rifles, one of which appeared to have been outfitted with a “switch” that would make it fully automatic.

Seen above, Maxwell was arrested on an assortment of felony and misdemeanor counts for which she is locked up in the Jones County jail in lieu of $35,000 bond.

I wonder how long Katelyn Maxwell will be in jail.

Sorry About The Blogging, It Was A Mess Lately

Yesterday, I was taking down the washing when I fell down the steps.

I was holding the lanudry when I fell two steps.

The missus is still dealing with her procedure, so I said I would take the washer.

I fell very hard, and at the end of the mess, a table was on top of me.

It wasn't fun, and my kneecaps were a bloody mess.

Sorry about the couple days.

Woman Goes From Choke Slam To Slammer

Angered about her girlfriend “not wanting to be sexual this morning,” a Florida Woman allegedly strangled the victim and performed a WWE-style chokeslam before grabbing a pair of scissors and chasing her partner out of their home, police report.

Tykia Sherman, 32, was arrested Sunday on multiple felony charges related to a violent confrontation last month in her St. Petersburg residence.

Tykia Sherman is not exactly the woman that men would want to see, but hey, she's trying.

The 31-year-old victim told police that after she declined to engage in sexual activity, Sherman “became upset” and shoved her against a wall and struck her numerous times. The woman added that Sherman then choked her and slammed her onto a couch.

She seems like she could jump into the WWE.

Shudder.