Wednesday, July 11, 2007

We Stink On Ice!

In case anyone has noticed, I haven't posted about my ice hockey team in a while. Why? Well, it's because we suck ass! After starting off the season 3-0, we have lost our last four games going into last night. And in a ten-game season, every game counts, so we should have been ready for the FUBAR Boys yesterday.

We weren't.

You know it's going to be a long night when five of your teammates don't show up. Vinnie Antonelli is on vacation (sans kids) with Mrs. Antonelli, Gusty couldn't make it, and three others were simply no-shows. Since we barely beat this team the first time we played them - we won in an OT shootout - you can imagine how we fared. Of course, you'd have to have the imagination of SpongeBob to calculate this disaster: we lost 8-3. It was our fifth loss in a row, and pretty much ended our season.

How did I play, you ask? Well, for those of you who make a living off betting against me, let's check the tally sheet . . .
  • If you had "Wyatt plays defense, and becomes a human turnstile," you win!
  • If you had "Wyatt won't score a point in three games," you win!"
  • If you had "Wyatt is a -6 in the game," you win!
  • If you had "Wyatt takes a slap shot to the ankle," you win!
  • Finally, if you had "Wyatt inadvertently scores on his own net," you win!
Thank you for playing, and good luck next game!

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