Band Of Brothers

My two oldest sons play in the school band. Both have played since they were in fourth grade. Every year, the band holds a Christmas concert and a Spring concert. This year is special, however. It is the first time Kyle and Erik have played together in the advanced band, and it is Kyle's last Christmas concert. They did not disappoint.

For the record, you cannot see either of the boys. Kyle plays trombone, and Erik is on drums. They are both in the back row on the right.

So, without further ado, The Carol of the Bells:



Yeah, this one got me emotional.

The Abs Have It

Apparently Britney Spears has pulled herself together and gotten right with her body. Or is that tight with her body?

Many fans questioned the legitimacy of Britney Spears' toned abs on the January/February cover of Women's Health, which hits newsstands next Tuesday. But the magazine dispelled the Photoshop rumors by sharing a behind-the-scenes video of the 33-year-old's cover shoot shot by Jeff Lipsky.

The pop diva's facial features were sharpened with contouring make-up, but her enviable figure is thanks to frequent swimming, yoga, and interval training classes at Drenched Fitness.

I'll bet you could bounce a quarter off those. Anyone have a quarter? Anyone? Bueller?

I Find Your Lack Of Flake Disturbing

Normally, I an not a big craft guy. Today? I'm a big craft guy.

Last night for family night by boys wanted to know how to make snowflakes that were better than the average snowflakes we normally make. We went on search of something that fit their description and found a tutorial on how to make Star Wars snowflakes! My boys were ecstatic and what was supposed to be about 10-20 minutes of making paper snowflakes turned into an hour or more of Star Wars snowflakes. (H/T - Easily Lost)

You can find the tutorials by clicking here. It's the perfect project to keep your boys - and girls - occupied during Christmas break.

Kari Me Away

Today is redhead, robo-babe, and Mythbusters cast member Kari Byron's 40th birthday! Personally, I don't think her body looks a day over 21, but I would need to confirm that with some hands-on research.

Kari, for me, has always been the best part about the Discovery Channel program - and Kari's best parts have always been on display.

If you know a guy who thinks Kari is hawt - and really, which guy doesn't - and was born on this date, remind him he shares a birthday with her. He will thank you for it, before rushing to Google images.

Similarly, today is Joseph Stalin's special day, so if someone you despise shares the date, remind them of that.

Oh My Goddess!

The Japanese "Boob Goddess" has created a tool to help women firm and enlarge their breasts.

Takiko Shindo's latest advancement in the bustling field of bust enhancement is something called the "Oppai Taisou Hand," that is basically a pink rake for stroking and brushing one's breasts.

The so-called "science," according to Shindo, is that ligaments holding up breasts need to move. Otherwise fats in the same area settle down around the chest muscles, and causes breasts to sag.

Why would women need a pink rake to stroke and brush their breasts when they have us? We're guys; we know a thing or two about stroking breasts!

Company Makes Lamps For Women’s Headlights

Sasswear has created lighted LED pasties. This may be the stupidest idea of all time, because no man worth his salt needs to be reminded where women’s breasts are located.

Though inspired by music festivals and raves, Sasswear’s Light Up Pasties shouldn’t be pigeon holed to these non-everyday events. The entire line of Light Up Pasties uses hypo-allergenic, reusable adhesive so no extra tape or glue is necessary to apply them, and removal is probably around 25 times easier than the One-Handed Bra Unclasp.

Light Up Pasties come in half a dozen different shapes and as many colors. The included batteries last over 20 hours and are replaceable when tapped. Sasswear also notes that their LEDs light up the pasties’ entire surface area, and their rainbow flash of colors can be seen several blocks away.

These are now mandatory for the co-bloggers. I’m wearing mine now, and they feel kinda sexy. That don’t make me queer, right?

Shooting The Star

While trolling the usual sites for story ideas, I came across this article, which simply had to ruin the first Star Wars film for me.

Well, not ruin, but it did make me think for a moment – and I hate thinking.

Think about it – the hangar they land in, the detention bay, the tractor beam controls, and the garbage chute are all within an elevator ride and a heroic chasm swing of each other. Luke and Han are in and out of the Death Star in maybe an hour.

Sure, the Death Star has turbo lifts, and we do see Luke and Han riding one, but those things aren’t moving at the speed of light. The circumference of Earth’s moon is 6,783 miles. Assuming the Death Star is around the same size, even if the turbo lifts were moving as fast as a commercial jet (about 500 miles per hour), it would still take 13 hours to get from one side of the facility to the other.

It would be a nightmare to work in a place that size. What if Vader needed you to take some documents down to Accounting, which is 12 hours away from your department by turbo lift?

I wonder if they hired stormtroopers for that, or just some nebbish like Milton Waddams? “Um, I believe you have my hydrospanner…”

Rent-A-Gent Promises You Won’t Get Bent

A new website is offering all the perks of hiring a male escort… without the worrisome hassle of having sex.

Rent-a-Gent is a new offering with a twist; the men on its books are contractually obligated not to have sexual encounters with clients.

Operating in 12 states from all corners of the U.S. and gaining fast popularity, the men on the Rent a Gent books are all deemed handsome, intelligent, and multi-talented, and you can hire them as companions for $200 an hour.

To investigate the Rent a Gent concept, 32-year-old writer Melanie Berliet, based in New York, booked Anthony; an actor and fitness instructor, for a three hour liaison. “He was, without a doubt, a true gentleman, and a naturally amiable, well-educated guy.”

Pfft, so am I, and as an added bonus, I guarantee I’ll bang ya! (I’m not kidding. I literally have no standards.)

My Friend Vica

With all due respect to the rest of you, He Said His Telephone Number Was 911 is now my favorite commenter. Yesterday he introduced me to the next Mrs. Earp: Eva “Vica” Kerekes.

Yes she is gorgeous, yes she is a redhead, yes she has freckles, and yes she is chesty. She’s basically Christina Hendricks’ twin sister.

However, Vica has something going for her which Christina does not. Vica was born and raised in Slovakia, which is like, prefect plus awesome!

I am officially ruined for other women now. It’s over. There is no one else but Vica.

Hmm, I wonder if she digs dim-witted, shapeless men?

Oh, and if the picture on the right doesn’t do it for you, the video clip below the fold will. I guarantee it!

Men Behaving Badly

First of all, I want to extend my deepest, most heartfelt sympathies to those harmed and murdered by the creep at Ft. Hood a couple of days ago. I wish I had a perfect way to phrase how heartbroken these incidents make me and that I know that my feelings of sadness are but a fraction of how those personally touched by the event feel, but this is the best I can do.

My good buddy Wyatt recently posted on the subject, and his post says a bunch of stuff I agree with, but in particular I want to focus on the last two paragraphs. Go read it; I’ll wait.

Regarding animosity toward police from those in the military… This is definitely “a thing”. I speak as a veteran of the Army and specifically of the MP corps. Let me put it this way: if “cops = pigs”, then “MPs = pig shit”. It’s not simply that there are a lot of wannabe thugs in the army – there are, of course – it’s that there’s a distortion of the feelings of camaraderie and brotherhood that one gets in the military going on. I hate to call out one MOS, so I will reduce it to saying “combat arms jobs”. Male-only world, with very few exceptions (I don’t have numbers, but there are likely still fewer than a dozen females, who are basically guinea pigs in these MOSs). These are the guys who truly do see the most combat action, and experience the worst that war has to offer. I’m not denying that at all, so before any fellas get their pretty blue panties in a twist, I know that they get the worst of the shit.